Post by jabba on Feb 10, 2013 11:19:59 GMT -5
The US Military, in an attempt to down size, was offering separation incentive to any service member with over 10 years of service. The deal was, they would pay $1000 for every 1" of distance between any two parts of your body.
The first in line was an Air Force Colonel. He asked to be measured from the top of his head to the soles of his feet. He was 6'-4" tall, and thought himself very clever. He was very smug when they issued him a check for $74,000.
The next person in line was a Navy Master Chief. Now, being only 5'-10" tall, he had an idea. When he stepped up to be measured, he extended his arm above his head and asked to be measured from the tip of his fingers to the soles of his feet. Very proud of having outsmarted the Air Force Officer, he cockily showed the Air Force Colonel his check for $93,000.
The next in line was an old Marine Gunnery Sergeant with a chest FULL of medals, and a sleeve lined with service stripes. With over 40 years in the Corp, he was as grizzled a Vet as anyone had ever seen. He was a small man, and the group held their breath as he asked them to measure him from the tip of his penis, to the bottom of his gonads. The Navy Corpsman doing the measuring asked him if he was sure, but Gunny was adamant. In his gravely voice he reiterated... "From the tip of my penis, to the bottom of my ball sack."
"OK" said the young Corpsman. "Drop you pants Sergeant." The man had the largest penis he had ever seen, but still, it was obvious he was going to take a beating from the big checks that the other men had received. He put the tape on the tip of his penis and stretched it out... only to find a horrible scar instead of testicles.
"Sergeant, where ARE your testicles?" Asked the Corpsman.
In a deep, slow, gravely voice that only a Marine of 40 years service could generate he answered... "Viet Nam"
;D
Jabba
The first in line was an Air Force Colonel. He asked to be measured from the top of his head to the soles of his feet. He was 6'-4" tall, and thought himself very clever. He was very smug when they issued him a check for $74,000.
The next person in line was a Navy Master Chief. Now, being only 5'-10" tall, he had an idea. When he stepped up to be measured, he extended his arm above his head and asked to be measured from the tip of his fingers to the soles of his feet. Very proud of having outsmarted the Air Force Officer, he cockily showed the Air Force Colonel his check for $93,000.
The next in line was an old Marine Gunnery Sergeant with a chest FULL of medals, and a sleeve lined with service stripes. With over 40 years in the Corp, he was as grizzled a Vet as anyone had ever seen. He was a small man, and the group held their breath as he asked them to measure him from the tip of his penis, to the bottom of his gonads. The Navy Corpsman doing the measuring asked him if he was sure, but Gunny was adamant. In his gravely voice he reiterated... "From the tip of my penis, to the bottom of my ball sack."
"OK" said the young Corpsman. "Drop you pants Sergeant." The man had the largest penis he had ever seen, but still, it was obvious he was going to take a beating from the big checks that the other men had received. He put the tape on the tip of his penis and stretched it out... only to find a horrible scar instead of testicles.
"Sergeant, where ARE your testicles?" Asked the Corpsman.
In a deep, slow, gravely voice that only a Marine of 40 years service could generate he answered... "Viet Nam"
;D
Jabba
