Post by dakota on Sept 14, 2006 18:28:40 GMT -5
Dumbest Duck Hunters of the YEAR!!!!!
A guy buys a new Lincoln Navigator for $42,500.00 (with
monthly payments of $560.00).
He and a friend go duck hunting in upper Wisconsin. It's
mid-winter; and of course all of the lakes are frozen. These two guys
go
out on the ice with their GUNS, a DOG, and of course the new NAVIGATOR.
They decide they want to make a natural looking open water
area for the ducks to focus on, something for the decoys to float on.
Now making a hole in the ice large enough to invite a passing duck, is
going to take a little more power than the average drill auger can
produce.
So, out of the back of the new Navigator comes a stick of
dynamite with a short 40 second-fuse. Now our two Rocket Scientists,
afraid they might slip on the ice while trying to run away after
lighting
the fuse (and becoming toast, along with the Navigator), decide on the
following course of action: they light the 40 second fuse; then, with a
mighty thrust, they throw the stick of dynamite as far away as
possible.
Remember a couple of paragraphs back when I mentioned the
NAVIGATOR, the GUNS, and the DOG...
Let's talk about the dog: A highly trained Black Lab used for
RETRIEVING. Especially things thrown by the owner. You guessed it: the
dog
takes off across the ice at a high rate of speed and grabs the stick of
dynamite, with the burning 40-second fuse, just as it hits the ice.
The two men swallow, blink, start waving their arms and, with
veins in their necks swelling to resemble stalks of rhubarb, scream and
holler at the dog to stop. The dog, now apparently cheered on by his
master, keeps coming. One hunter panics, grabs the shotgun and shoots
the
dog. The shotgun is loaded with #8 bird shot, hardly big enough to stop
a
Black Lab. The dog stops for a moment, slightly confused, then
continues
on. Another shot, and this time the dog, still standing, becomes really
confused and of course terrified, thinks these two geniuses have gone
insane. The dog takes off to find cover, UNDER the brand new Navigator.
The men continue to scream as they run. The red hot exhaust
pipe on the truck touches the dog's rear end, he yelps, drops the
dynamite
under the truck and takes off after his master.
Then " "" "" "" "" " BOOOOOOOOOOOOM "" "" "" "" "" ! ! ! !
The truck is blown to bits and sinks to the bottom of the
lake, leaving the two idiots standing there with "I can't believe this
just
happened" looks on their faces.
The insurance company says that sinking a vehicle in a lake
by illegal use of explosives is NOT COVERED by the policy. And he
still
had yet to make the first of those $560.00 a month payments.
The dog is okay. . .doing fine.
A guy buys a new Lincoln Navigator for $42,500.00 (with
monthly payments of $560.00).
He and a friend go duck hunting in upper Wisconsin. It's
mid-winter; and of course all of the lakes are frozen. These two guys
go
out on the ice with their GUNS, a DOG, and of course the new NAVIGATOR.
They decide they want to make a natural looking open water
area for the ducks to focus on, something for the decoys to float on.
Now making a hole in the ice large enough to invite a passing duck, is
going to take a little more power than the average drill auger can
produce.
So, out of the back of the new Navigator comes a stick of
dynamite with a short 40 second-fuse. Now our two Rocket Scientists,
afraid they might slip on the ice while trying to run away after
lighting
the fuse (and becoming toast, along with the Navigator), decide on the
following course of action: they light the 40 second fuse; then, with a
mighty thrust, they throw the stick of dynamite as far away as
possible.
Remember a couple of paragraphs back when I mentioned the
NAVIGATOR, the GUNS, and the DOG...
Let's talk about the dog: A highly trained Black Lab used for
RETRIEVING. Especially things thrown by the owner. You guessed it: the
dog
takes off across the ice at a high rate of speed and grabs the stick of
dynamite, with the burning 40-second fuse, just as it hits the ice.
The two men swallow, blink, start waving their arms and, with
veins in their necks swelling to resemble stalks of rhubarb, scream and
holler at the dog to stop. The dog, now apparently cheered on by his
master, keeps coming. One hunter panics, grabs the shotgun and shoots
the
dog. The shotgun is loaded with #8 bird shot, hardly big enough to stop
a
Black Lab. The dog stops for a moment, slightly confused, then
continues
on. Another shot, and this time the dog, still standing, becomes really
confused and of course terrified, thinks these two geniuses have gone
insane. The dog takes off to find cover, UNDER the brand new Navigator.
The men continue to scream as they run. The red hot exhaust
pipe on the truck touches the dog's rear end, he yelps, drops the
dynamite
under the truck and takes off after his master.
Then " "" "" "" "" " BOOOOOOOOOOOOM "" "" "" "" "" ! ! ! !
The truck is blown to bits and sinks to the bottom of the
lake, leaving the two idiots standing there with "I can't believe this
just
happened" looks on their faces.
The insurance company says that sinking a vehicle in a lake
by illegal use of explosives is NOT COVERED by the policy. And he
still
had yet to make the first of those $560.00 a month payments.
The dog is okay. . .doing fine.
